It's really been a while from my last Xanga update... Actually this few days were hell... Back too school...with lot of quiz... I never expect F.6 could be HELL... cos... some of my friends are going to F.7 this year... they walk through F.6...and seems...it's not too bad.. but this year...wowah! I never think about suicide but I really did think about it during this few days... "Don't push yourself too hard"... "You are not alone"... "God will make a way, this is what you've taught me"... I really thank you for the encouragement... I really impressed...but I still have to do the exam by myself... I am still alone when I taking the exam... It is hard to not pushing myself too hard...impossible... I am always the chosen one in my family... It is a lie to tell you I am not worrying about the future, the coming years my parents always told me... "we can only depend on you" "See you cousin? Since they've been promoted to F.6, they wake up at 3am and start study" Man... I am not them, I am not the smart guy... I have my dream, I am not going to be a doctor or lawyer... I just want to play music...maybe that is a silly method cos musician can't make money... but that just my dream...So what? Please don't bother what I do... Oh... lets think more positive... Maybe F.6 is really not that bad...? Maybe I really not alone...? Maybe I will become a musician in the future...? Maybe I won't give up and suicide when I'm in a difficulty...? Maybe... Maybe... | 
